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Amika 2023-12-19 18:53:56 +08:00
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@ -5,7 +5,7 @@ info:
location: Shanghai
---
> "I will change into gentle breeze and rain, then surround you all along."
> "I will transform myself into gentle breeze and rain, then surround you all along."
>
> By Yumao
>
@ -17,17 +17,17 @@ info:
Yumao (Zhangqianye) is a trans girl, who is gentle, smart, tough and lovely.
She introduced herself in her profile: Perhaps Yumao doesn't like taking part in group activities. I love white and red, also that kind of rainbow in Glitch. And I have a sweet tooth, I will feel happy for a long time while holding a packet of white rabbit creamy candies. I love cats, and adopt a cat called Ayaka.
She introduced herself in her profile: Perhaps Yumao doesn't like taking part in group activities. I love white and red, as well as that kind of rainbow in Glitch. And I have a sweet tooth, I will feel happy for a long time while holding a packet of white rabbit creamy candies. I love cats, and adopt a cat called Ayaka.
She was an admiral of *Kancolle* , and her first action figure was Destroyor Akizuki in *kancolle*.
She loved time with silent and ease. For example, she put on the headphones and drank hot coffee in café, she watched out of the window and observed people came and left. This would make her relaxed. Sometimes, she had some special thoughts. She wished to shooting stars at times, she said: "It's not because I believe that, but in that it's free. And there's no evidence shows it doesn't work."
She loved time with silent and ease. For example, she put on the headphones and drank hot coffee in café, then watched out of the window and observed people came and left. This would make her relaxed. Sometimes, she had some special thoughts. She made wishes to shooting stars occasionally, she said: "It's not because I believe that, but in that it's free. And there's no evidence shows it doesn't work."
According to Neko, Yumao loved spicy hot pot, and always enjoyed it with rice.
Yumao liked to watch stars when she didn't sleep yet at night. After she returned to China, due to bad weather and few time, she couldn't watch stars as previous time. So [she made a special trip to Dishui Lake once and watched stars](https://web.archive.org/web/20210517104313/https://oao.moe/archives/834/).
Yumao liked to watch stars when she didn't sleep yet at night. After she returned to China, due to bad weather and few spare time, she couldn't watch stars as previous time. So [she made a special trip to Dishui Lake once and watched stars](https://web.archive.org/web/20210517104313/https://oao.moe/archives/834/).
She saved many thoughts in her [private blog](https://web.archive.org/web/20210420170241/https://oao.moe/archives/), and these blog posts included many areas: computer science, military and politics. She was also a girl who loved literature, and she wrote down much beautiful prose and poetry. Of course, she recorded daily life in her blog, and we can still see her story, her experience, and her train of thoughts now.
She saved many thoughts in her [private blog](https://web.archive.org/web/20210420170241/https://oao.moe/archives/), and these blog posts included many areas: computer science, military and politics. She was also a book girl, and she wrote down much beautiful prose and poetry. Of course, she recorded daily life in her blog, and we can still see her story, her experience, and her train of thoughts now.
## Experience
@ -37,19 +37,19 @@ In 2017, she encountered Neko in Twitter (Now X), and she felt that Neko was ski
In that period, there was not so much censorship about transgender topic in Zhihu. So Yumao always @ Neko in relevant topics, then showed their affection in public.
During that time, Yumao got many mental supports. Yumao described the care from Neko like this:
During that time, Yumao got many mental supports. She described the care from Neko like this:
> "Even that things were dark and painful, which had been hidden, you still observed and felt them. Maybe you understanded more then myself. How wonderful... You also found my scattered identity, then lifted me out of abyss. That was the first time I was been touched by others."
> "Even those things were dark and painful, which had been hidden, you still observed and felt them. Maybe you understanded more then myself. How wonderful... You also found my scattered identity, then lifted me out of abyss. That was the first time I was been touched by others."
However, they were forced to separate. After that, Neko was brought back to Yunnan by family, and was sent to correctional school. Then, it was reported that Neko had commited suicide and died. Chinese media *Beijing News* reported this in video. Yumao was extremely grieved after hearing the news. She continuously sent messages about missing Neko in their Telegram channal. She quoted *Cassiopeia(カシオペヤ)* , which was a song they used to listen together, to express her grief.
However, they were forced to separate. After that, Neko was brought back to Yunnan by family, and was sent to correctional school. Then, it was reported that Neko had commited suicide and died. Yumao was extremely grieved after hearing the news. She continuously sent messages about missing Neko in their Telegram channal. She quoted *Cassiopeia(カシオペヤ)* , which was a song they used to listen together, to express her grief.
Although she also found that the suicide of Neko was complicated and confusing according to some routes. But there was no more news about Neko indeed. She really hoped Neko was still alived:
> "I always stay alive for you...I get lost cuz missing you. Wish I can see a vibrant you."
> "For you I always stay alive... For without you I get lost in life. Wish you are still alive... "
>
> (Another version in Zhihu: "Only for you I stay alive... But you are not by my side. Isn't it? Wish you are still alive...")
She always missed Neko, and recalled the days with her. Yumao often wrote down some caring words in her blog, such as prompted Neko to manage her hair, or told Neko to add or subtract clothes.
Yumao always missed Neko, and recalled the days with her. She often wrote down some caring words in her blog, such as prompted Neko to manage her hair, or told Neko to add or subtract clothes.
In this period, Yumao tried to remember previous time and those things which is moving, happy and blissful. But her heart was took up by sadness, and her memory gradually worsen. She said that she forgot many things.
@ -69,7 +69,7 @@ In her blog post *[Separation and Reunion](https://web.archive.org/web/202105171
In Zhihu question [What are your thoughts about ZhiHu user @yu-zhang-31-35 ?](https://www.zhihu.com/question/284818437), many friends wrote their memories of yumao, and expressed their sandness and regret of the death of her. They also felt regrettable for Neko's death due to close relationship between Neko and Yumao.
In fact, Neko didn't pass away. Before the news of Neko's death, in her email in 19th March, they still encouraged each other with the words "Must stay alive".
In fact, Neko didn't pass away. Before her "death", in her email in 19th March, they still encouraged each other with the words "Must stay alive".
Transgender cummunity investigated this thing once, and found the fact that Neko was pronounced dead by her family.
@ -78,9 +78,9 @@ Transgender cummunity investigated this thing once, and found the fact that Neko
Neko and Yumao were forced to seprate in Shanghai. After that, Neko was brought to Kunming, Yunnan, and then hospitalized at a mental health centre for treatment.
During the time, Neko always hoped to meet with Yumao. She had dinner with her parents and got a interim leave from the hosptial, then she tried to contact Yumao in this time gap. After their contact, she persuaded the doctor on duty to issue discharge certificate for her. This action irritated her family. Shortly afterward, her family drived her to Kunming Anning Haohaizi School (hereinafter referred to as "*Haohaizi") in the name of taking her to Changshui Airport. After that, Neko was locked in the Room 308, which can be seen as a black room.
During the time, Neko always hoped to meet with Yumao. She had dinner with her parents and got a interim leave from the hosptial, then she tried to contact Yumao in this time gap. After their contact, she persuaded the doctor on duty to issue discharge certificate for her. This action irritated her family. Shortly afterward, her family drived her to Kunming Anning Haohaizi School (hereinafter referred to as "Haohaizi") in the name of taking her to Changshui Airport. After that, Neko was locked in the Room 308, which can be seen as a black room.
Days after she came out of the Room 308, owing to her command of computer was excellent and their trust in her, the propaganda department of Haohaizi found her and asked her to fix network system. Neko accepted and fixed the system quickly, then sent a help email to Yumao.
Days after she came out of the Room 308, owing to her excellent command of computer and their trust in her, the propaganda department of Haohaizi found her and asked her to fix network system. Neko accepted and fixed the system quickly, then sent a help email to Yumao at once.
After that, the outside world started to lash out her parents. The investigative journalist of *Beijing News* also interviewed the staff of Haohaizi to ask the whereabouts of Neko.

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@ -41,7 +41,7 @@ info:
>「即便是那些曾经被埋没的,黑暗的,痛苦的,你也悄悄观测到了,感受到了,可能比我自己还要了解得多一些吧,好厉害。那个已经碎碎的自己,也被你看到了呢,甚至被抱了出来,第一次被别人碰到呢。」
然而,她们在 2018 年 3 月中旬被迫分开随后Neko 被家人带回云南送入了矫正中心。此后不久Neko 传出了轻生后抢救无效的消息,并得到了新京报的报道。知道这个消息的羽毛极度悲伤和难过,她在她们的 Telegram 频道之中发送了许许多想念 Neko 的消息。她引用了《仙后座 (カシオペヤ) 》一曲来表达自己的悲伤,这是她们曾经一起听过的歌曲。
然而,她们在 2018 年 3 月中旬被迫分开随后Neko 被家人带回云南送入了矫正中心。此后不久Neko 传出了轻生后抢救无效的消息,知道这个消息的羽毛极度悲伤和难过,她在她们的 Telegram 频道之中发送了许许多想念 Neko 的消息。她引用了《仙后座 (カシオペヤ) 》一曲来表达自己的悲伤,这是她们曾经一起听过的歌曲。
尽管她也通过一些渠道发现Neko的「自杀」似乎仍有些扑朔迷离但 Neko 确实也一直杳无音讯。她在内心一直期望着 Neko 还在:
@ -80,7 +80,7 @@ Neko 和羽毛被迫在上海分开之后,被父母带回了云南昆明,而
在这段时间里Neko 一直想着要去寻找羽毛于是在院外与家人吃饭的间隙尝试和羽毛联系并说服了当值医生给自己开具出院证明。此举激怒了其家人。此后家人索性假借送她去长水机场之名将其开车送至昆明安宁市好孩子学校以下简称「好孩子」此后Neko 被关入了 308 房间,也可以理解成小黑屋一样的存在。
在从308房间出来之后数日由于 Neko 掌握着不错的计算机技术,加上此时宣传部门较为信任她,于是他们找到了 Neko要求其帮助他们修理网络系统。Neko 在修复网络系统后迅速给羽毛发送了邮件。
在从 308 房间出来之后数日,由于 Neko 掌握着不错的计算机技术,加上此时宣传部门较为信任她,于是他们找到了 Neko要求其帮助他们修理网络系统。Neko 在修复网络系统后迅速给羽毛发送了邮件。
随后外界开始了对Neko父母的言论轰炸《新京报》的记者也找到了好孩子询问Neko的下落。

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@ -41,7 +41,7 @@ info:
>「即便是那些曾經被埋沒的,黑暗的,痛苦的,你也悄悄觀測到了,感受到了,可能比我自己還要了解得多一些吧,好厲害。那個已經碎碎的自己,也被你看到了呢,甚至被抱了出來,第一次被別人碰到呢。」
然而,她們在 2018 年 3 月中旬被迫分開隨後Neko 被家人帶回雲南,送入了矯正中心。此後不久Neko 傳出了輕生後搶救無效的消息,並得到了新京報的報導。知道這個消息的羽毛極度悲傷和難過,她在她們的 Telegram 頻道之中發送了許許多想念 Neko 的消息。她引用了《仙后座 (カシオペヤ) 》一曲來表達自己的悲傷,這是她們曾經一起聽過的歌曲。
然而,她們在 2018 年 3 月中旬被迫分開隨後Neko 被家人帶回雲南,送入了矯正教育學校。此後不久Neko 傳出了輕生後搶救無效的消息,知道這個消息的羽毛極度悲傷和難過,她在她們的 Telegram 頻道之中發送了許許多想念 Neko 的消息。她引用了《仙后座 (カシオペヤ) 》一曲來表達自己的悲傷,這是她們曾經一起聽過的歌曲。
儘管她也通過一些途徑發現Neko的「自殺」似乎仍有些撲朔迷離但 Neko 確實也一直杳無音訊。她在內心一直期望著 Neko 還在:
@ -80,7 +80,7 @@ Neko 和羽毛被迫在上海分開之後,被父母帶回了雲南昆明,而
在這段時間裡Neko 一直想著要去尋找羽毛於是在院外與家人吃飯的間隙嘗試和羽毛聯繫並說服了當值醫生給自己開具出院證明。此舉激怒了其家人。此後家人索性假借送她去長水機場之名將其開車送至昆明安寧市好孩子學校以下簡稱「好孩子」此後Neko 被關入了 308 房間,也可以理解成小黑屋一樣的存在。
在從308房間出來之後數日由於 Neko 掌握著不錯的電腦技術,加上此時宣傳部門較為信任她,於是他們找到了 Neko要求其協助他們修理網路系統。Neko 在修復網路系統後迅速給羽毛發送了郵件。
在從 308 房間出來之後數日,由於 Neko 掌握著不錯的電腦技術,加上此時宣傳部門較為信任她,於是他們找到了 Neko要求其協助他們修理網路系統。Neko 在修復網路系統後迅速給羽毛發送了郵件。
隨後外界開始了對Neko父母的言論轟炸《新京報》的記者也找到了好孩子詢問Neko的下落。