[U] Update entry for Jennife80677612

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location: Hebei, China
---
## Description
Jennifer was a lovely trans girl who called herself a cute cat.
> I am in so much pain, indeed.
>
> I also know that many transgender friends on Twitter are in pain as well.
>
> But we all have to strive to live.
>
> Even if no one around me supports me, I know that you are there across the internet.
>
> So I am not alone.
## Experience
Jennifer was a trans girl longing for happiness.
When she was 13 years old,
she told her parents for the first time, "**I want to be a girl.**"
However, her parents dismissed it,
thinking that she was influenced by her classmates,
and strongly denied her thought with harsh words.
At that time, Jennifer didn't know what "transgender" meant,
but she understood the negative connotation of her parents' harsh words.
Nevertheless, she bravely expressed her wish to them:
> "I just want to be a normal girl, to study and live like other girls..."
In her innocence,
she thought they would understand,
but it was only the beginning of her nightmare.
After starting junior high school,
she tried to make her parents understand her better.
So she start to find information about "transgender" online.
She even read academic papers, attempting to communicate with her parents.
Jennifer said:
> "Transgender identity is something I was born with... It's just that a girl's soul is in the wrong body. I don't even ask for SRS. But can you just let me wear girls' clothes, and grow my hair long? I know I'm not pretty, but is it a crime to want to wear girls' clothes?"
But all her efforts were in vain,
and what she received in return was more scolding.
Later, in a state of extreme mental distress,
she got into a vocational high school.
However, after one year,
her parents forced her to take a gap,
claiming that "vocational schools are full of bad kids."
Since then, she had been living under her parents' constant surveillance,
with no privacy and no sense of security.
Nearly four years of mental control caused her to develop several mental illnesses.
Online psychometric scales showed that she was severely depressed, anxious, and mentally exhausted, but she couldn't go to a regular hospital for treatment.
In June 2023, Jennifer turned 18.
She was eager to find a job and leave home.
Due to her lack of education,
she could only work at a local beverage shop,
earning just enough to make ends meet.
But she knew it would be a long time to escape her original family.
She had to present herself as male for job interviews and work,
and everyone referred to her with the wrong pronouns,
which caused her great distress.
> "I really can't live with a mask on... Is it so hard to be myself..."
Despite this, she felt that even working as a server every day was better than staying in the suffocating environment at home.
She seemed to see a glimmer of hope.
During that time, she even thought that if she could just endure and save enough money,
she could live on her own and free herself from her family.
Unfortunately, her improved mental state didn't last long.
Her depression and anxiety often caused uncontrollable episodes,
and after working for just over a month,
she had to leave her job and return home.
After returning home,
the harsh words flooded her ears once again.
But by then,
her heart had grown numb.
## Departure
Jennifer once said, "Jennifer is a strong girl nya~ Jennifer won't block anyone."
But there was one time, and the last time,
she made an exception:
"I blocked the account of Han Lianyi. I think she's a great person, but I don't want her to save me. I'm sorry, Sister Han, I'm so sorry..."
As the New Year approached,
fireworks and firecrackers were alight with spark,
carrying people's best wishes.
The warm glow of lights filled thousands of homes.
But Jennifer left this world in the biting cold wind,
Her story remained in the New Year's Eve.
Brief illusions brought her happiness and kept her from the cold...
But until the end of her story,
she never got to take estrogen,
wear a beautiful dress,
or be called "Miss."
Jennifer, may you no longer suffer and find the happiness in another world.

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---
name: 珍妮QwQ~
name: 珍妮QwQ
info:
alias: Jennife, Jennifer
location: 中国河北
---
「」
## 简介
珍妮是一个自称猫猫的可爱的跨性别女孩。
> 我很痛苦,我确实很痛苦。
>
> 我也知道推上的许多跨性别的兄弟姐妹ta 们都很痛苦。
>
> 但是,我们都要努力地活着。
>
> 即使身边没有人支持我,还有隔着网线的你们在,我就知道我不是孤身一人。
## 经历
13 岁的时候,她第一次和父母说「我想做一个女孩」,但她的父母不以为意,认为她是被同学带坏的,并用听起来很刺耳的言语回应了她。
珍妮是一个渴望快乐的跨性别女孩。
13 岁的时候,她第一次和父母说「我想做一个女孩」。但她的父母不以为意,认为她受到了同学的影响,并用刺耳的言语强烈地否定了她。
珍妮当时并不知道什么是「跨性别」,但她知道父母口中刺耳的话语意味着什么。
她向他们表达了自己真实的愿望:
不过,依旧勇敢地向他们表达了自己真实的愿望:
> 「我只是想当个普普通通的女孩子,和其他的女孩子一样,正常学习,正常生活……小时候的我天真地以为,他们会懂,但那只是我噩梦的开始。
> 「我只是想当个普普通通的女孩子,和其他的女孩子一样,正常学习,正常生活……」
从读初中开始,她一直尝试着让家长理解她,并在网上查到了「跨性别」相关的概念。她和父母说道:
小时候的她天真地以为他们会懂,但那只是她噩梦的开始。
初中以后,她尝试让家长进一步理解她,并在网上查到了「跨性别」相关的概念,甚至找来学术论文,试图与父母沟通。
珍妮这样说道:
> 「这是天生的……只是一个女孩子的灵魂住错了身体。做手术我就不奢求了,你们能不能让我穿一穿女孩子的衣服,留一留女孩子的发型呢?我知道我长得丑,但我想穿着女孩子的衣服,是什么犯罪的事情吗?」
但一切都是徒劳的,她的努力换来的也是更多的责骂。
部分经历内容源于珍妮生前留下的遗书。
后来,她在精神状态极度糟糕的情况下,考上了一所职业高中。然而,读了一年以后,家长又以“职高里都是坏孩子”为理,强制给她办了休学。
从此,她便一直活在家长的监视之下,没有隐私,没有安全感。
将近四年的精神控制使她得了许多精神类疾病,她在网上测试的量表显示她已经是重度抑郁焦虑与精神衰弱,可她没有办法去正规医院就诊。
2023 年 6 月,珍妮迎来了 18 岁生日。她迫不及待地想找份工作离开家里。
由于学历不够,她只能在当地的奶茶店打工,日薪勉强能维持生计。
但她知道,想要逃离原生家庭,还有很长的路要走。
她只能以男性身份去面试和工作,所有人都以错误的性别代词称呼她,这让她感到很痛苦。
> 「我果然还是不适合戴着面具生活呀……做真实的自己就这么难吗……」
尽管如此,她觉得,哪怕天天当服务员,也比在家里的窒息环境待着要好。
她似乎看到了曙光。在那段时间里,她甚至觉得只要熬过去,挣到钱了,就能够自己出去居住,从而摆脱原生家庭的束缚。
但好景不长,她的抑郁与焦虑常让她不受控制地犯病,在坚持工作了一个多月之后,她就离职回家了。
回家以后,那些刺耳的话语又重新涌入了她的耳中。
但此时,她的内心已经麻木了。
## 离世
珍妮曾说过:「珍妮是一个内心强大的女孩子喵,珍妮不屏蔽任何人。」
但唯有一次,也是最后的一次,她破例了:
「我屏蔽了寒涟漪,我觉得她很伟大,但我不希望她能救我。对不起,寒姐姐,对不起。」
新年之际,烟火和鞭炮寄托着人们的心愿,
千万家里的灯火温暖而明亮,
但珍妮却在凌冽的寒风之中离开了,
她的故事留在了跨年夜之中。
短暂的幻觉给她带来了快乐,也让她不再寒冷……
可直到故事的结尾,她也没能吃上雌二醇,没能穿上漂亮的小裙子,没能被人叫过一声小姐姐。
珍妮,愿你在那边的世界中不再受苦,得到想要的快乐。

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---
name: 珍妮QwQ~
name: 珍妮QwQ
info:
alias: Jennife, Jennifer
location: 中國河北
---
## 簡介
> 我很痛苦,我確實很痛苦。
>
> 我也知道推特上的許多跨性別的兄弟姐妹ta 們都很痛苦。
>
> 但是,我們都要努力地活著。
>
> 即使身邊沒有人支持我,還有隔著網線的你們在,我就知道我不是孤身一人。
## 經歷
珍妮是一個渴望快樂的跨性別女孩。
13 歲的時候,她第一次和父母說「我想做一個女孩」。但她的父母不以為意,認為她受到了同學的影響,並用刺耳的言語強烈地否定了她。
條目貢獻One-Among-Us
珍妮當時並不知道什麼是「跨性別」,但她知道父母口中刺耳的話語意味著什麼。
不過,她依舊勇敢地向他們表達了自己真實的願望:
> 「我只是想當個普普通通的女孩子,和其他的女孩子一樣,正常學習,正常生活……」
小時候的她天真地以為他們會懂,但那只是她噩夢的開始。
初中以後,她嘗試讓家長進一步理解她,並在網上查到了「跨性別」相關的概念,甚至找來學術論文,試圖與父母溝通。
珍妮這樣說道:
> 「這是天生的……只是一個女孩子的靈魂住錯了身體。做手術我就不奢求了,你們能不能讓我穿一穿女孩子的衣服,留一留女孩子的髮型呢?我知道我長得醜,但我想穿著女孩子的衣服,是什麼犯罪的事情嗎?」
但一切都是徒勞的,她的努力換來的也是更多的責駡。
後來,她在精神狀態極度糟糕的情況下,考上了一所職業高中。然而,讀了一年以後,家長又以“職高裡都是壞孩子”為理,強制給她辦了休學。
從此,她便一直活在家長的監視之下,沒有隱私,沒有安全感。
將近四年的精神控制使她得了許多精神類疾病,她在網上測試的量表顯示她已經是重度抑鬱焦慮與精神衰弱,可她沒有辦法去正規醫院就診。
2023 年 6 月,珍妮迎來了 18 歲生日。她迫不及待地想找份工作離開家裡。
由於學歷不夠,她只能在當地的奶茶店打工,日薪勉強能維持生計。
但她知道,想要逃離原生家庭,還有很長的路要走。
她只能以男性身份去面試和工作,所有人都以錯誤的性別代詞稱呼她,這讓她感到很痛苦。
> 「我果然還是不適合戴著面具生活呀……做真實的自己就這麼難嗎……」
儘管如此,她覺得,哪怕天天當服務員,也比在家裡的窒息環境待著要好。
她似乎看到了曙光。在那段時間裡,她甚至覺得只要熬過去,掙到錢了,就能夠自己出去居住,從而擺脫原生家庭的束縛。
但好景不長,她的抑鬱與焦慮常讓她不受控制地犯病,在堅持工作了一個多月之後,她就離職回家了。
回家以後,那些刺耳的話語又重新湧入了她的耳中。
但此時,她的內心已經麻木了。
## 離世
珍妮曾說過:「珍妮是一個內心強大的女孩子喵,珍妮不遮罩任何人。」
但唯有一次,也是最後的一次,她破例了:
「我封鎖了寒漣漪,我覺得她很偉大,但我不希望她能救我。對不起,寒姐姐,對不起。」
新年之際,煙火和鞭炮寄託著人們的心願,
千萬家裡的燈火溫暖而明亮,
但珍妮卻在淩冽的寒風之中離開了,
她的故事留在了跨年夜之中。
短暫的幻覺給她帶來了快樂,也讓她不再寒冷……
可直到故事的結尾,她也沒能吃上雌二醇,沒能穿上漂亮的小裙子,沒能被人叫過一聲小姐姐。
珍妮,願你在那邊的世界中不再受苦,得到想要的快樂。

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