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183 lines
7.4 KiB
Markdown
183 lines
7.4 KiB
Markdown
---
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name: Sugar ~ 100% PURITY
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info:
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alias: Dethelly, 五洲
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location: Yubei, Chongqing
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---
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## Description
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In Fall 2023, Sugar went to Hangzhou, Zhejiang, to attend university.
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She was an introverted girl who cared too much about others' feelings, so she wasn't able to express herself when she needed it.
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She was too shy to express her confusion and anxiety.
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Moreover, she had no friend to confide in her thoughts; she could only hide them in her heart.
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That made her look a bit intimidated.
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She always prepared a lot before meeting friends in real life.
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She was always worried about leaving a bad impression, so she asked them tons of questions in advance (such as which kinds of gifts they would like) and warned them she might exhibit regressive behaviours.
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Her family is conservative.
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Her father worked for China Railways Group, and her mother was a teacher.
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She didn't receive enough love from them.
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They once threw away the gender-affirming clothing she hid while she was in high school.
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Therefore, she was sure her parents were too conservative to communicate with.
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## The dissipated haze in Hangzhou
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On January 6th, 2024, Sugar met friend A in Hangzhou.
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Just before meeting A, she hid in the restroom and kept checking the mirror.
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She was ashamed to meet A because she didn't do her hair or wear cute clothes.
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Actually, she was still pretty despite that.
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The two girls visited many places of interest in Hangzhou……
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West Lake Culture Square, Wulin Suqare, Wuliu Lane, and Fengshan Gate.
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When parting, She asked A about her thoughts on her plan to "threaten" her parents (to gain acceptance of being trans).
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> *Here is what A remembered:*
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>
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> Sugar: Perhaps I need to "threaten" them since they are too conservative to communicate with.
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>
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> Sugar: I'm afraid of pain, but I could hurt myself a bit.
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>
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> Sugar: Thereby, they might make a compromise eventually, and I might get more freedom in return.
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>
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> Sugar: According to the plan, I will delete you from my friend list after this parting.
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>
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> Sugar: You shouldn't be worried about me. Please forget me as soon as possible.
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When A left for home, she left Sugar half a bag of oranges and messaged her "Adios." (Goodbye) on QQ.
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A didn't get any reply.
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That night, Sugar actually deleted her contact.
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On the second day, a Twitter user who claimed to be Sugar's high school classmate sent her some random thoughts on behalf of Sugar.
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Then A requested them to look after her.
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Later, Sugar began her winter vacation and got her diagnosis certificate of gender dysphoria in Shenzhen Kangning Hospital —— This was only known by A after her death.
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## Thick fog over Jialing River (Her departure)
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On January 22nd, 2024, she went back to her hometown, Chongqing, and regained contact with A.
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(According to her mother who worked away from Chongqing, when she just returned home, she seemed happy in WeChat.)
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But the reality is the opposite.
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She contacted A before she began to execute her plan.
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She told A again and again that her purpose was not to die.
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The point is to make her parents realize the necessity of accepting her being trans by showing she's willing to die.
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But the dosage she was about to take was fatal.
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A and her other online friends couldn't persuade her, so they called for first aid as a last resort.
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Because they didn't know her exact location, the ambulance left after more than half an hour had passed.
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Unfortunately, Sugar was in critical condition when the ambulance arrived at the Second People's Hospital of Yubei District of Chongqing.
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And she passed away in the early morning of the next day due to chemical poisoning.
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## After her departure
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Later, through a variety of ways, Sugar's mother contacted A on the morning of January 23rd.
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After A told her about Sugar's gender dysphoria and the fact of suicide, she was astonished and said:
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> "He(sic. The same below) had never told us about this! Why he abruptly did……"
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>
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> (It seemed that Sugar didn't directly and openly communicate with her parents about this.)
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The loss of her child overwhelmed her.
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She said words like Sugar was too selfish and didn't care about them.
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Then she tried to unlock Sugar's phone.
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A asked her mother to bury Sugar as a daughter, but her mother replied like [this](https://twitter.com/KiraRettosei/status/1749728762261012752?s=19).
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(The link may be triggering.)
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However, her mother's attitude was changing gradually.
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Her parents started to tidy up her belongings.
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Her mother asked A if she wanted to keep Sugar's IKEA Blåhaj Shark, which she loved to hug.
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Her mother said he was their angel, but unfortunately, God made him leave early, and he had to leave.
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Her mother had always been grateful to A.
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## The new spring
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It's February 12th, 2024—the third day of Spring Festival.
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That night, A set off on a trip to Guiyang and Chongqing.
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At Ningbo Lishe International Airport,
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A sat on a seat near the windows, waiting for the launch of the plane.
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In a daze, a phone call from Chongqing came, and she was familiar with the number.
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>(*The words in brackets represent A.*)
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>
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> Girl, how are you now? (I am fine, what happened?)
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>
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> It's nothing, but…… I've always worried that you might……as well. So I'm calling to ask if you're okay or not.
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>
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> Girl, if anything happens in the future, please tell your parents and not hold back and say nothing. Your parents will always love you.
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>
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> After our generation became parents, we no longer keep the authority and stubbornness of our elders.
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>
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> So do I…… The path I am currently taking in life is not what my parents hoped, but I think it's no problem.
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>
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> We may not fully understand the decisions made by children, but we will support her if she carefully considers them.
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>
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> Girl, I am glad you're okay. I wish you a happy life.
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Sugar had a cute face and figure.
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If we change a character of her name to another homophonic one, it would become a girl's name that perfectly matches her gentle and soft temperament.
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But she just departed with a mentality of "take a gamble".
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Her life was frozen at the age of 19.
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When Sugar just passed away, her mother couldn't accept her decisions. But what did her mother say in the end?
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Anyway, she had passed away.
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## Qingming
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<!-- 关于清明的翻译问题,海外有 Ching Ming 之说,此处取现代汉语拼音翻译。对于“清明节”,Festival可以包括清明的踏青部分,但此处基于条目的追思方向,故省去Festival。 -->
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Just before Qingming, her mother suddenly sent messages to A.
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Her mother told A how diligent and excellent she was and how much they loved her.
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Sugar's father said that Sugar was the brightest star in the sky.
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<PhotoScroll photos={[
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'${path}/photos/photo1.jpg',
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]} />
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However, everything went wrong.
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If Sugar was still alive, what would happen now...?
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It was a pity that she departed abruptly, without waiting for a turn for the better.
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> Hope you'll all remember Sugar.
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>
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> I hope you can share important information, such as your address, with trustworthy friends to avoid any unexpected situations.
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>
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> I hope that if you see a help request message, you don't just swipe.
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>
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> I hope that if you can call the police, you can dial decisively. You are a lifesaver, not a murderer. Don't be afraid.
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>
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> I hope you cherish life. Hope still exists; you will only miss the opportunity if you leave too early.
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>
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> Hope you'll all remember Sugar.
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Take care.
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<!-- Contributor:[KiraRettosei](http://github.com/KiraRettosei) -->
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<!-- This entry's contributor has requested not to be featured on the webpage. -->
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