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128 lines
6.2 KiB
Markdown
128 lines
6.2 KiB
Markdown
---
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name: Huacha
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info:
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alias: Huacha, Futa Juhuacha
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location: Chongqing, China
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---
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## Description
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Huacha was a lovely and determined trans girl who loved this world.
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She was an OIer and once participated in the National Olympiad in Informatics(NOI).
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She adored long hair, so she opted for hair extension to fulfill her love for it.
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She loved writing and reading, and she often delved into the works of Lu Xun.
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She showcased her fluency in poetry and her ability to critique the world by writing essays, reminiscent of Lu Xun's style.
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Realizing her true gender identity at an early age,
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she struggled with severe anxiety,
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which she she endured silently for a long time.
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She always felt that she was trapped in a nightmare of not being recognized as a girl,
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and she hoped to wake up from it everyday.
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Later, she chose the path of self-discovery, and embraced her identity as a girl.
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Huacha was a gentle girl, akin to her friend [Xuewulihuameng](https://one-among.us/profile/xuewulihuameng).
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She offered helpful advice in Zhihu Question [How can I help my MtF friend?](https://www.zhihu.com/question/274131925/answer/372594163).
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After introducing some suggestions, she wrote at last:
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> "If you actually don't understand how to give reasonable advice when she experiences an emotional breakdown, you can simply accompany her at her side silently (you can even hug her, because when I was in emotional breakdown I hoped someone would hug me)...spend more time with her..."
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## The Blood Mary Observer
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*The Blood Mary Observer* was a series of articles on Zhihu authored by Hucha.
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She passed away shortly after she wrote down these articles.
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So there were only three articles in *The Blood Mary Observer*.
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but the profound content was still worth reading.
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The first article was *[In Memory of Ms.MtF (Mr.Ftm)](https://zhuanlan.zhihu.com/p/38000835)*[^1].
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The article was written around May to June 2018.
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At that time, Zhihu, which was a platform originally claimed to LGBT friendly, started to conduct strict censorship on transgender related topics.
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Many transgender users were blocked due to this crisis,
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and many records about transgender community were deleted on these days.
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Huacha wrote down the article to accuse Zhihu and express her indignation towards persecution of Transgender community.
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She appealed to people that everyone to respect the right of transgender individuals to express their inner thoughts - whether they were MTF or FTM, or individuals of any other gender.
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The article was concise and straightforward, and its words didn't pull any punches.
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just as the comment said:
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> "This article is quite in the style of Lu Xun. #LOL#"
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The third article was *[Yazyuu Senpai Zhihu Setu](https://zhuanlan.zhihu.com/p/38419017)*, the original point of it was the same as the first article.
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The article humorously expressed her dissatisfaction with the strict censorship of transgender related topics by Zhihu, which originally claimed to LGBT friendly.
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The second article was *[Invisible Poison](https://zhuanlan.zhihu.com/p/38173742)*.
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The article mainly focused on the persecution experienced by transgender individuals at the hands of their original families.
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She pointed out that some parents were essentially murderers,
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and the so-called "love" ultimately became the "poison" that killed children.
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> There were many transgender individuals who have been exposed to an invisible poison called "love" and left the world at last.
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> The parents deprived their basic rights as human beings in the name of "love".
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>
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> Legally, due to parents have the special status of "guardian",
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> the difficulty for transgender individuals to obtain assistance has greatly increased.
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>
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> Excerpted from *Invisible Poison*
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Today, many transgender individuals choose to leave this world due to this kind of "Invisible Poison".
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This article still has its profound practical significance.
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Before the article published, one of her transgender friends (probably Xueli) took herself due to domestic pressure and violence.
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Another reason for writing down this article was to mourn her, as well as countless transgender friends who passed away owing to the invisible poison.
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## Her Departure
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On April 2nd, 2018, Xueli passed away by suicide.
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From the first seven day to the seventh seven day[^2] of Xueli's death,
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she always missed Xueli, the lovely gentle girl who quietly left alone.
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> May the world treat you gently.
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>
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> It's suddenly raining heavily in Chongqing...
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>
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> Is this your way of calling me...?
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During the days, Huacha's mental health became worse and worse.
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She said that frankly that she was not sure about that if she could live to the seventh seven day of Xueli's death.
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On the fourth seven day,
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she almost couldn't control the thought of suicide on the Huanghuayuan Jialingjiang Bridge,
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which was a land of fate —— the place of death of Xueli and several other MtFs in Chongqing.
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At the end of June, she attempted to take her own life again and was admitted to ICU.
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Afte her physical condition improved, she wrote down this little poem:
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<PhotoScroll photos={[
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'${path}/photos/photo1.jpg',
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]} />
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In fact, she still hoped to live.
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Until days before she departed, she was still finding hope of living,
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and she asked Siri about methods to prevent suicide.
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But the unfortunate thing still happened at last.
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On the evening of July 10th, she walked up to the Huanghuayuan Jialingjiang Bridge again.
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The dreamlike lighting seemed to immerse her in a dream...
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In the same place, a similar night, she took her own life as Xueli did.
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The rescue in the late night failed to save her life.
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In the early morning of the next day, The girl chasing the milky way left the world at last.
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> Farewell, Huacha. Hope you and Xueli can be together well in heaven.
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>
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> Only thing we can do is living with hope...
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>
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> NekoyaFam, 2018-07-11, on Zhihu
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Contributors for this entry: One-Among-Us, [Kristall Wang](https://github.com/KristallWang)
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[^1]: The title format imitates *In Memory of Ms.Liu Hezhen*, which was a famous work of Lu Xun, published on April 12th 1926.
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[^2]: Funeral customs in East Asia. In tradition, the memorial ceremony is held every seven days after a person's death, with one session lasting seven days and a maximum of seven sessions. It will take 49 days to complete.
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